Posted by Anita den januar 21, 2007
En mann møtte en dag en professor i logikk. Mannen var ikke snauere enn at han spurte hva logikk egentlig var, og professoren tenkte at her må det inn med teskje.
Professoren: Jo, nå skal du høre: Har du akvarium?
Mannen: Ja?
Professoren: Da liker du vel fisk, da?
Mannen: Ja, det gjør jeg!
Professoren: Og siden du liker fisk, liker du sikkert dyr?
Mannen: Joda, det stemmer det.
Professoren: I og med at du liker dyr, kan jeg regne med at du også liker mennesker?
Mannen: Ja, det er klart.
Professoren: Da liker du vel kvinner også, da?
Mannen: Selvfølgelig!
Professoren: Siden du liker kvinner, går jeg ut i fra at du er gift med en?
Mannen: Det stemmer også!
Professoren: Nå har du fått en liten demonstrasjon i logikk. Håper det hjalp på forståelsen!
Noen dager senere møtte mannen en kamerat og fortalte stolt at han hadde truffet en professor i logikk. Kameraten var ikke stort smartere enn sin venn og spurte “Hva er egentlig logikk?”
Mannen: Jo, nå skal du høre! Har du akvarium?
Kameraten: Nei.
Mannen: Å, faen! Jeg visste ikke at du var homse!?
Publisert i Vitser, gåter og andre historier | 3 Kommentarer »
Posted by Anita den januar 21, 2007
3 minute management course
Lesson One:
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, “Can I also sit like you and do nothing?” The eagle answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.
Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
Lesson Two:
A turkey was chatting with a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, “but I haven’t got the energy.”
“Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull.” They’re packed with nutrients.”
The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day he reached the second branch and, finally, after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.
Management Lesson:
Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.
Lesson Three:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Management Lesson :
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend..
(3) And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut!
This ends the three minute management course.
Publisert i Jobbsnakk, Vitser, gåter og andre historier | 4 Kommentarer »
